Sunday, July 6, 2008

Letting Down

Ok, the immediate demands of taking care of my Mom have lessened and I'm very glad of that. I spent the weekend, doing pretty much nothing. I called to check on her a couple of times a day while Sister #3 has been there, just to make sure all is well. I bought groceries for the first time in three weeks. I actually cooked a meal or two. Even cooked a cake for J, when he came down to nap in his old bedroom. He said he was coming to visit with us, but that usually means, he gets to give us a hug and see our face, then he's off again. This time, he hung around sleeping until his Dad got home from work, while I cooked a cake for him to take back with him.

I messed up though. Nothing major, it just bothers me that I wrote something that offended someone. I didn't mean to. We all know that you can't hear voice tone in an email, and sometimes the recipient misunderstands your meaning. The Twitter thing is relatively new to me, and I've always been extremely curious as to why someone I don't know would follow me. Twice, after looking at twitter pages, I've blocked folks I was unsure of, but this time I actually contacted someone who was following me and asked them why. I never meant to offend them, or imply they were stalkers. But, it seems she was hurt by my inquiry and sent me a note explaining why, aplogizing and saying she would now withdraw from following me. And the strange thing is, in her note, she made me very curious about her life. I apologized, and asked her tell me more, but I fear she has washed her hands of me. That's very disappointing. And it bothers me more than I would like to admit.
LeLe has often told me I'm too fearful of this sort of thing. I'm afraid I err on the side of caution more often than not. I suppose this shows how many folks I might have met and enjoyed corresponding with, had I been braver.

I've had the whole weekend to just chill and now I don't really feel chilled. I feel disappointed. Maybe depressed. I know it's not just that little error that is to blame for it all though. I know it's the letting down of all the demands of the moment. I don't think I've really begun to deal with everything, being on auto-pilot most of the time. Maybe getting back into the day-to-day routine of work will get me back to where I need to be. Like when folks say you had to go back to work to get some rest from vacation. :)

I will be going to check on Mom this evening and give her a daily shot of Lovenox. I'll make sure her meds are organized and she is feeling ok. I think she may be ready to stay by herself now. I just hope she doesn't over-do it. She's pretty fiesty. I am told she is on so many prayer chains, I've lost count. They are working big time, considering how well she is feeling. We appreciate it more than we can say.


LeLe said...

Don't let it bother just never know. You were just being precautious.

LC said...

I too am very over-cautious. I don't know why and I too don't mean to offend anyone, but I am just unsure of those that I don't know. I understand!

Michelle said...

I'm the same way. But, I'm getting better. I just try to look at it as I have more important things to concern myself with in the big scheme of things. You can't let that lady distract you from what is on your plate right now!