I drove to Mom's today to check on her, take her medicine refills, and prime the walls of her hall and living room, so Sister#2 can paint tomorrow. A little before my Dad passed, we all got together and painted one of my Mom's living room walls a bright dark red. Daddy loved it. We chose a very light yellow gold to do the other walls and a bit later, Mom painted the lower half of her hall walls with the red and the upper half with the yellow. She's been wanting to paint over it for quite some time now, so we decided we would do whatever made her happy right now. (And who wouldn't if their Mom was going through chemo???) I spent about 5 hours painting and cutting in. That red did NOT want to go. It took two coats of primer in the hall and three coats in the living room. I'm feeling the effects of all that looking up and reaching too. But, she was so pleased. I just hope #2 can follow up tomorrow, cause I have other issues to deal with.
She is having unexpected bursts of nausea, that are over with almost before they start. So she isn't really staying sick, just not keeping everything she eats down. Her strength is improving so she must be eating enough. She has lost weight of course, and looks so skinny to me. Her hair hasn't started falling out yet, but she purchased some caps to wear when that starts. She is getting very tired of sitting at home and not being able to do what she wants. She's so used to being outside and mowing her yard. I hope some of the family can do that huge chore for her this weekend, because her grass is getting pretty deep with all the rain we've had.
I must take my Tucson to the dealership and let them look at a light that won't stay off. It's the ESC light and it has something to do with keeping it from hydroplaning and "stuff" like that. I have to go all the way to Conway where we purchased it, because SR feels that they will want to make sure it's in tip top shape, since they are the ones who sold it. I don't mind going so much, but I have to go alone, because there is no one free to go with me. I really do get tired of having to do everything by my lonesome.
J has made an offer on a house he wants to purchase in Russellville. I am thrilled for him but so fearful he will make a mistake. Mom and Dad have not been invited to help in this transaction, and it's hard for us to sit back and not have any input. We would love to see him have a place of his own, we just don't want him to pay more than he should, and then find out the house is in need of a lot of repair. Fortunately, Sister #2's hubby is a home inspector and he has agreed to give the house a good going over. Please help me pray that J makes the right decision in this. He is in love with the house and the yard and I'd like to see him happy with it.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Summer Slump?
Last night Mom sounded like she felt better. She said she did. No nausea and she was able to eat. Her back is giving her a little pain and that worries me but it's not really severe, so maybe it's ok. We are waiting for her PCP to call us with a colonoscopy appointment since the oncologist wants her to have one as soon as possible.
I plan to go to her house on Friday and start priming her walls for paint. In the scheme of things, painting her walls is not a priority, but it gives her something to focus on. On Saturday I have to take my new vehicle to the dealership and let them look at a light that stays on. Not supposed to do that. Ugh. And there is no one to go with me, so I am moaning and whining about having to spend the day in Conway all by myself while they check out my suv.
I can't believe there is still so much sickness. It's summer for goodness sake. The time when we are supposed to go into a slump of sorts, but that's not the case this year. It's like the flu season never ended. God in his Mercy thinned out the patients while I had to be out. That helped my co-workers, but the patients are back with a vengeance. It's ca-razy.
I plan to go to her house on Friday and start priming her walls for paint. In the scheme of things, painting her walls is not a priority, but it gives her something to focus on. On Saturday I have to take my new vehicle to the dealership and let them look at a light that stays on. Not supposed to do that. Ugh. And there is no one to go with me, so I am moaning and whining about having to spend the day in Conway all by myself while they check out my suv.
I can't believe there is still so much sickness. It's summer for goodness sake. The time when we are supposed to go into a slump of sorts, but that's not the case this year. It's like the flu season never ended. God in his Mercy thinned out the patients while I had to be out. That helped my co-workers, but the patients are back with a vengeance. It's ca-razy.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Mom is experiencing a bit of nausea and fatigue. I think her mind is a bit fuddled to, but how could it not be? She came to the clinic for a weekly lab check ordered by the oncologist yesterday. Sister #2 brought her from Rison to Sheridan, and they bought a few groceries at Walmart. Next visit with gyno-oncologist is July 21, and next chemo is July 25.
Since things have settled a bit, my back is acting up again. God gives you what you need while you need it, and the pain is increasing after not being a problem while Mom was so needful of my help. Or maybe the activity made a difference. I tried walking to the post office from the clinic yesterday and was in severe pain by the time I got back. After sitting for a little while, it got much better. I am beginning to feel though, like I'm 100 years old, and I think I'm walking a little funny too. I guess I'm trying to relieve pressure or pain or something and do it without really thinking.
The work day yesterday was hectic after being closed for so many days. It's always like that on the first work day after a holiday. At least the day flew by. We are beginning to look for a replacement for our LPN who is leaving in August or September to have a baby. Lucky girl is going to stay home with her babies. I remember those times. Priceless.
Since things have settled a bit, my back is acting up again. God gives you what you need while you need it, and the pain is increasing after not being a problem while Mom was so needful of my help. Or maybe the activity made a difference. I tried walking to the post office from the clinic yesterday and was in severe pain by the time I got back. After sitting for a little while, it got much better. I am beginning to feel though, like I'm 100 years old, and I think I'm walking a little funny too. I guess I'm trying to relieve pressure or pain or something and do it without really thinking.
The work day yesterday was hectic after being closed for so many days. It's always like that on the first work day after a holiday. At least the day flew by. We are beginning to look for a replacement for our LPN who is leaving in August or September to have a baby. Lucky girl is going to stay home with her babies. I remember those times. Priceless.
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Letting Down
Ok, the immediate demands of taking care of my Mom have lessened and I'm very glad of that. I spent the weekend, doing pretty much nothing. I called to check on her a couple of times a day while Sister #3 has been there, just to make sure all is well. I bought groceries for the first time in three weeks. I actually cooked a meal or two. Even cooked a cake for J, when he came down to nap in his old bedroom. He said he was coming to visit with us, but that usually means, he gets to give us a hug and see our face, then he's off again. This time, he hung around sleeping until his Dad got home from work, while I cooked a cake for him to take back with him.
I messed up though. Nothing major, it just bothers me that I wrote something that offended someone. I didn't mean to. We all know that you can't hear voice tone in an email, and sometimes the recipient misunderstands your meaning. The Twitter thing is relatively new to me, and I've always been extremely curious as to why someone I don't know would follow me. Twice, after looking at twitter pages, I've blocked folks I was unsure of, but this time I actually contacted someone who was following me and asked them why. I never meant to offend them, or imply they were stalkers. But, it seems she was hurt by my inquiry and sent me a note explaining why, aplogizing and saying she would now withdraw from following me. And the strange thing is, in her note, she made me very curious about her life. I apologized, and asked her tell me more, but I fear she has washed her hands of me. That's very disappointing. And it bothers me more than I would like to admit.
LeLe has often told me I'm too fearful of this sort of thing. I'm afraid I err on the side of caution more often than not. I suppose this shows how many folks I might have met and enjoyed corresponding with, had I been braver.
I've had the whole weekend to just chill and now I don't really feel chilled. I feel disappointed. Maybe depressed. I know it's not just that little error that is to blame for it all though. I know it's the letting down of all the demands of the moment. I don't think I've really begun to deal with everything, being on auto-pilot most of the time. Maybe getting back into the day-to-day routine of work will get me back to where I need to be. Like when folks say you had to go back to work to get some rest from vacation. :)
I will be going to check on Mom this evening and give her a daily shot of Lovenox. I'll make sure her meds are organized and she is feeling ok. I think she may be ready to stay by herself now. I just hope she doesn't over-do it. She's pretty fiesty. I am told she is on so many prayer chains, I've lost count. They are working big time, considering how well she is feeling. We appreciate it more than we can say.
I messed up though. Nothing major, it just bothers me that I wrote something that offended someone. I didn't mean to. We all know that you can't hear voice tone in an email, and sometimes the recipient misunderstands your meaning. The Twitter thing is relatively new to me, and I've always been extremely curious as to why someone I don't know would follow me. Twice, after looking at twitter pages, I've blocked folks I was unsure of, but this time I actually contacted someone who was following me and asked them why. I never meant to offend them, or imply they were stalkers. But, it seems she was hurt by my inquiry and sent me a note explaining why, aplogizing and saying she would now withdraw from following me. And the strange thing is, in her note, she made me very curious about her life. I apologized, and asked her tell me more, but I fear she has washed her hands of me. That's very disappointing. And it bothers me more than I would like to admit.
LeLe has often told me I'm too fearful of this sort of thing. I'm afraid I err on the side of caution more often than not. I suppose this shows how many folks I might have met and enjoyed corresponding with, had I been braver.
I've had the whole weekend to just chill and now I don't really feel chilled. I feel disappointed. Maybe depressed. I know it's not just that little error that is to blame for it all though. I know it's the letting down of all the demands of the moment. I don't think I've really begun to deal with everything, being on auto-pilot most of the time. Maybe getting back into the day-to-day routine of work will get me back to where I need to be. Like when folks say you had to go back to work to get some rest from vacation. :)
I will be going to check on Mom this evening and give her a daily shot of Lovenox. I'll make sure her meds are organized and she is feeling ok. I think she may be ready to stay by herself now. I just hope she doesn't over-do it. She's pretty fiesty. I am told she is on so many prayer chains, I've lost count. They are working big time, considering how well she is feeling. We appreciate it more than we can say.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Long Day
First one is over. We left Whitehall at 9:00 a.m. for UAMS in Little Rock and finally landed in Rison this evening around 6:30 p.m. Because it was her first treatment, we had to wait quite a while for the pharmacy to send down her chemo meds. As others who signed in after us kept being called back, we began to get antsy, but an hour after our appointment time, they got us started. The pre-chemo meds they gave her were SUPPOSED to make her drowsy. Well, she was drowsy for maybe 30 minutes, then she was WIRED. Walking around, squirming, fidgity. She had more energy after we were finished than since she first got sick. We went grocery shopping on the way home and she wanted to go to Walmart, but I over-ruled that one. We stopped at Dorey's concession and bought her some good ole fried catfish. She ate four pieces on the way home, and before I left her to go home, she was working on the rest.
While Mom was getting chemo, Sister #2 got very sick. She suffers from migraines and her migraine med didn't mix well with something else she had taken (evidently.) We discussed my taking her home to Whitehall and coming back for Mom, but I decided I really wasn't comfortable leaving Mom, so we called Niece to come pick her up. Poor thing. I drove her car home to her and she was still in the bed when we got there.
Sister #3 is down from Russellville to relieve us for the weekend. All the meds Mom has to take could make a genius pull his hair out. So, I wrote notes and made labels etc. I still had to talk to Sis on the phone about them so she would get it clear in her head. I remember what is what, simply because I've been taking care of it for all this time. There were two more medications added to her huge daily amount, and they are a little confusing. They are to combat the nausea they tell us will kick into high gear tomorrow. I think though, that #3 can handle it.
Mom has already lost 5 pounds and we fear she will be a walking skeleton before it's all said and done. She will also become very dry, and it's apparent that's begun, because the daily Lovenox shot is getting harder to give. Her skin is just getting tougher to penetrate. The oncology nurse told her "I don't care what you drink, as long as you DRINK!" I believe Mom got that message loud and clear because she told me she knew she would have to make herself drink even if she didn't want it. (At least one thing stuck in her mind anyway. ;)
So tomorrow, July 4, since Sister #3 is there, I plan to do nothing. Sleep late, water my flowers, sit in the yard, etc. I would dearly love to have a pool to float around in, but since I don't, I'll try to just enjoy doing nothing. I hope the rest of you have a great holiday weekend.
While Mom was getting chemo, Sister #2 got very sick. She suffers from migraines and her migraine med didn't mix well with something else she had taken (evidently.) We discussed my taking her home to Whitehall and coming back for Mom, but I decided I really wasn't comfortable leaving Mom, so we called Niece to come pick her up. Poor thing. I drove her car home to her and she was still in the bed when we got there.
Sister #3 is down from Russellville to relieve us for the weekend. All the meds Mom has to take could make a genius pull his hair out. So, I wrote notes and made labels etc. I still had to talk to Sis on the phone about them so she would get it clear in her head. I remember what is what, simply because I've been taking care of it for all this time. There were two more medications added to her huge daily amount, and they are a little confusing. They are to combat the nausea they tell us will kick into high gear tomorrow. I think though, that #3 can handle it.
Mom has already lost 5 pounds and we fear she will be a walking skeleton before it's all said and done. She will also become very dry, and it's apparent that's begun, because the daily Lovenox shot is getting harder to give. Her skin is just getting tougher to penetrate. The oncology nurse told her "I don't care what you drink, as long as you DRINK!" I believe Mom got that message loud and clear because she told me she knew she would have to make herself drink even if she didn't want it. (At least one thing stuck in her mind anyway. ;)
So tomorrow, July 4, since Sister #3 is there, I plan to do nothing. Sleep late, water my flowers, sit in the yard, etc. I would dearly love to have a pool to float around in, but since I don't, I'll try to just enjoy doing nothing. I hope the rest of you have a great holiday weekend.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
And It Begins
Tomorrow is the first day of chemo. Since it's her first one, we don't know how she will react, so we are trying to prepare for the worst. I initially planned to take her by myself, so Sister #2 wouldn't have to miss any work, but I decided I might need help if Mom becomes really sick while I'm driving home. I bought a small insulated bag to take her some Diet Coke and cheese and crackers to snack on while she is there. I don't know if she will feel much like eating but at least we will be prepared for it.
She spent the day at Sister's house and seemed ok. Her pain didn't get any worse today, and she ate well. She seems a little quiet, and I'm sure she is dreading tomorrow and thinking about the days ahead. And who wouldn't? I discussed the back pain issue again with the nurse practitioner I work with. She seems to think (and I tend to have a lot of faith in her thoughts) that Mom's pain is simply from the severity of the surgery. After all, they had to open her up pretty wide to get to all the cancer. And they may even have had to take her organs out to get to it. That would make anyone's back hurt, dontcha think? It is much easier to think of it that way, than to wonder if there is something more severe going on with it. And we DO NOT want to go there.
I've had several folks ask about her the last two days and it's always really nice to know people care enough to ask. Thanks folks. Remember us tomorrow kind readers.
She spent the day at Sister's house and seemed ok. Her pain didn't get any worse today, and she ate well. She seems a little quiet, and I'm sure she is dreading tomorrow and thinking about the days ahead. And who wouldn't? I discussed the back pain issue again with the nurse practitioner I work with. She seems to think (and I tend to have a lot of faith in her thoughts) that Mom's pain is simply from the severity of the surgery. After all, they had to open her up pretty wide to get to all the cancer. And they may even have had to take her organs out to get to it. That would make anyone's back hurt, dontcha think? It is much easier to think of it that way, than to wonder if there is something more severe going on with it. And we DO NOT want to go there.
I've had several folks ask about her the last two days and it's always really nice to know people care enough to ask. Thanks folks. Remember us tomorrow kind readers.
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Doctor Speak
I talked with the gyno-oncologist today. She is the one who performed Mom's surgery, but has been out of the office for a week or so. She was not aware that Mom had been in the hospital in her absence, so I explained what went on. If Mom's pain in her back is not better by tomorrow, the doctor wants to see her tomorrow.
Mom's treatments will be every 21 days, 6 to 8 times. We won't know her prognosis until we see how she reacts to the chemo. 5 year survival rate for this type of cancer is 30%. If after treatment, it does not return in a 2 year period, that rate increases. That is all I know at this point.
Sister #2 has taken Mom to her home to better care for her. I will deal with weekends as needed and be the one taking her to chemo. This was the only way we could both continue to work and care for her properly. Niece is still home for the summer and can monitor Grandma and call when she needs help. When school starts, if Mom is unable to stay by herself, we will have to regroup and figure something else out. Pray that God will provide wisdom and opportunity to take good care of Mom.
Mom's treatments will be every 21 days, 6 to 8 times. We won't know her prognosis until we see how she reacts to the chemo. 5 year survival rate for this type of cancer is 30%. If after treatment, it does not return in a 2 year period, that rate increases. That is all I know at this point.
Sister #2 has taken Mom to her home to better care for her. I will deal with weekends as needed and be the one taking her to chemo. This was the only way we could both continue to work and care for her properly. Niece is still home for the summer and can monitor Grandma and call when she needs help. When school starts, if Mom is unable to stay by herself, we will have to regroup and figure something else out. Pray that God will provide wisdom and opportunity to take good care of Mom.
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