Going Through

The weekend was spent going through my Mom's closets and drawers, etc. I dreaded the job for days, but my siblings and I planned to do it together, so I followed through. Sometimes there are petty squabbles and arguments in situations like this, but we didn't have any of that. PRAISE GOD! We all got along very well, always allowed the others a say in what was done and who got what. We actually had a good time together and it did my heart so good.

We didn't get it all done, there was no way we could have in two days, but we got a lot of it taken care of. Going through her stuff was comical at times, and frustrating at others. She was a hoarder, and I hope to goodness I don't leave that much stuff for my kids to have to deal with. She had much of what my grandmother left as well as her own stuff, so it was like going through two people's things.

We all came away with things we wanted, and some we didn't really want, but didn't want to get rid of...(Us hoarding? Nah.) And I wound up with some things that will be perfect in my bedroom when I finish the redo. (I'm making progress on that, but not enough to suit me.)

 

I can vividly remember the above items being in my grandmother's house when I was growing up. They aren't worth a whole heck of a lot, but they mean a great deal to me and I am going to LOVE having them in my bedroom.  I never realized the vase was actually a calla lily until I brought it home. SCORE!

My siblings laughed at me when I said I liked the piggy. I am in love with it and have it on my kitchen sink. The other vase I never really noticed but decided I liked it enough to bring home.

 

These shoes were mine when I was a toddler. We found them in a trunk at the foot of Mom's bed. Wow. 

We also cleaned out her "Christmas House". She had a shed dedicated to her Christmas decorations. I brought home a few things, but one of my sisters had two truck loads of the stuff. She will obviously carry on the tradition! We were absolutely amazed at how much was packed into that shed.

It was an exhausting weekend, but a productive one. There were other things I brought home, but the best part about it all was the time spent with my siblings.

Sick Boy

Our LMW has been a very sick little boy. Three nights of walking the floor with him, or holding him upright on our chest so he can try to breathe. Bad swollen sore throat and fever. There's no telling where he caught this particular bug, if it is one. The practitioner we took him to Wednesday thought there was a possibility that it's caused from teething. It can happen, and he is in Super Slobber mode lately.

He's such a good boy, even when he's sick. I took some photos of him in his number 8 shirt for his eighth month birthday. He's passed that now, but we are just now getting his photo wearing it. There were a few photos I took that showed just how sick he was looking but I chose to delete those. They are so sad.

See, he always smiles...even when he's feeling poorly.

He has to wear a bib most of the time, so he won't stay sopping wet from all the drool. Here's hoping and praying he's on the mend. It's really heartbreaking to see him feeling so ill.

Random Thought Thursday

I just got a crazy urge to take some every day photos....

Azalea encased in ice.

My poor Rhododendron...one succumbed to the heat, this one may succumb to the cold. Maybe someone is trying to tell me they aren't supposed to be in my flower bed....

From one of the bouquets sent to my Mom's service. They are beginning to wilt, so I captured them for all time.

Capturing another plant from the service. Wonder if I will wind up killing this Cyclamen? I'm not too good with flowering houseplants.

I finished the clothes for Raggedy Andy last night. Mom had it all done except one row of hair and the clothes. It's for LMW.

I finished it Mama, so you don't have to fret about it any more.

Snow

As I wrote yesterday, I woke from a nap to snow. I took some photos hoping to get some really good shots with my new camera.

I love watching the birds in the back yard, especially when the feeders are full and the weather is cold. SR wiped the snow away so they could get to the openings for their food.

As you can see, my cedar trees are still dead. (I suppose we will remove them in the spring.) And you can tell how deep the snow was, which was pretty deep for south central Arkansas.

The Goldfinches have appeared.

The view from my back door last night. You can see the snow falling.

The view from my front door this morning.

Watching for his chance...

My new camera is faster than the old one, and I was able to catch the chickadee before he flitted away. They fly down from above, grab the seed and immediately fly away again. It's hard to get a good photo of them.

 All fluffed up with the cold. Brrrrrr!

The snow will be with us for a while, as the temps are going to hover around the freezing mark for several days. I'm sure the school kids are going nuts with glee, and their parents are moaning. At least this snow is deep enough, and wet enough for snowmen, so they can get outside and have some fun!

The Day After

Mother's funeral was very lovely. The casket spray was beautiful, and the music was a recording of my niece. We were all moved. The cemetery was blustery, but that word could be used to describe my Mom's personality. She was all or nothing. She had two speeds, stop and full throttle.

Today my body shut down. I've been going so hard and so long that the first opportunity to stay home and rest turned into a day of sleep. I woke this afternoon to snowfall and it feels like a cool balm to my soul for some reason. My grandmother, Mom's mother, loved the snow and it actually snowed on the day we buried her. So, my siblings and I choose to think she is sending snow as a sign she has reunited with my Mom and they are enjoying the show. In this part of the state, snowfall is not a common occurrence, so we definitely cherish it.

I don't know how long it will take before I stop expecting the phone to ring with Mom on the other end of the line telling me she needs to go to the ER, or asking me to pay a bill for her online. I keep expecting to get a text from my sister that I need to come back to the house, or that Mom had a good or bad night on the nights I actually slept at home. How long before I stop thinking, "Oh, I need to ask Mom about that."

I never thought at the age of 52, I would have lost both my parents. It seems so young to lose them. Dad was 70 and Mom was 71. They passed 6 years apart. And now we have the monumental task of going through our childhood home, and trying to decide what to keep, what to give away and what to throw away. It will take us months.

Most everyone goes through this eventually, but it always seems you are the only one when you are going through it yourself. There will be good days and bad days. There will be laughter at her wacky sense of humor and tears at her loss. But time will ease the pain somewhat and we will get through it.

It is Done

At 6:00 a.m. my mother passed away from my sight. She is not dead. I fully believe she is in the presence of the Living God with my father. It was hard to let her go, but was so heart wrenching to watch her lay in that bed suffering. She was surrounded by her five children. I was not at her bedside, having gone home for a break, but she waited until I got back to pass. How loving. How humbling.

My family and I have had an outpouring of love and comfort from family, friends and acquaintances. It's amazing how one woman touched so many lives. And it's very strange to know she will not be in that house for us to gather around any longer. The pain comes and goes, and will do so for a while. Do you ever get over losing your parents? Are we officially orphans now? I've been sleeping with one ear to the phone so long, waiting for a call from or about her, I don't know how to sleep any other way.

The finality of it is almost devastating, there is no getting away from it or around it. We will lay her earthly body down beside my father Saturday afternoon. That gives us a measure of peace.

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, no more fears....He'll wipe away the tears.....

Holding Vigil

Mother is in her last hours.....or it could be days? We don't really know, but she could pass at any time.

It's been hard to watch her linger. And we felt we needed to tell certain people the severity of the situation. Unfortunately, she wouldn't allow us to tell any of her friends how seriously ill she was until now. As a result they are appearing at her home to visit with her, while she is unable to visit, but responsive enough to let her children know she is not happy with all the attention and visitors. We've had to devise a way of steering folks away from coming, encouraging them to cut their visits short when they do, and talk softly. They deserve to grieve for her, and to tell her goodbye in their own way, but it's not what she wanted.

We children are exhausted, but can't and won't leave her for long. We are thankful for the hospice care she is receiving, the outpouring of love her friends and family are showing, the delicious food brought, and the knowledge that we may not know the hour of her passing, but God does and has a plan.
 

Please keep us in your prayers.